Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Mason and Me

I often wish that I could raise my children one by one instead of all at the same time. I remember when it was just Cameron and I and I could completely focus my attention on that little guy without feeling pulled away by other little gremlins that demanded my time. I really mourned when Gavin was born and I felt so guilty that now Cameron would have to share his mama. Then Mason came and it was easier because the older boys were now used to sharing, but I still craved one on one time with each of them. Well, now the tables have turned, and Cameron and Gavin are gone during most days and Mason only had preschool two mornings a week so we are finding ourselves alone with each other. I couldn't be more thrilled to be able to dote on my littlest guy. Mason and I walked to the playground with a picnic lunch last week, he insisted on bringing our red wagon, and I pulled him most of the way there. I didn't take my cell phone, no magazine, I had no internet access, and we weren't even meeting anyone we knew there. It was an open-ended date, spontaneously thrown together simply because the weather was beautiful and the house cleaning could wait. When we got there, the park was empty and I got to slide down the slide, swing on the swings, and pretend to be a pirate saving our ship. There was nothing to pull my attention away from this most important time, completely and totally devoted to my Mason. We ate our lunch and talked about his favorite shows and the new friends he was making in preschool. It made me realize that I need to carve out more of that kind of time with my children, no distractions, just quality. It felt good to really give him a little piece of myself, even it was only for a couple of hours, and he beamed a bit brighter because of it. I am finding more time now to just be with him, this week we made these adorable and delicious cookies together and I let him add the ingredients and lick the bowl, it's been too long since we've done that. I need to remind myself to slow down and savor these opportunities to connect with these boys and show them that they are worth my time. Because they really are and I panic every time I think about how old they are becoming and how much time I have left with them. Blink and they will be grown, that's what I'm constantly told. I am loving this stage of life right now and the three (4) little hooligans that bring me happiness. I just wish there were more hours in the day.

Buzz Lightyear jammied Batman eating his breakfast:


Angie said...

Love this post.

Mandi said...

That kind of got me teary-eyed. I have had these same thoughts for a long time now. I feel like it is all-too-easy to turn on some cartoons for Luke when Ashley is napping and I just know that I don't give him the amount of time that Sara used to get. She had us to herself for so long...I need to be better- thanks for the reminder.